Turning Point at the Age of 40


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It started young, puffing on joints I would find in my uncle’s jacket pocket. I remember sneaking out to the backyard for alone time and privacy. That may have been the first time I used a drug, but I doubt that’s when it all started. No, it all started when I was much younger because I was molested somewhere between 6 and 8 years old by an older cousin. Maybe it was all the fighting, beatings, drug activities, misery, depression, hate, and unhealthy love I had to witness and endure.

Read more: Addicted to Love and Drugs

Yes, hardship started very young for me. Later down the road in my late teens and early twenties, I started using harder drugs such as powdered cocaine, pills, and alcohol. That poison took me to some very scary and dark places. Ten years of incarceration, lost loves, lost relationships, material possessions, peace of mind, depression, anxiety, and now at the age of 40, I finally have a clue.

Read more: Addicted: Fatal Attraction

I am sober, now and forever, hopefully! My plans are to finally become pregnant and give birth to an extension of me. I am in the beginning stages of owning my own home and starting my cleaning service. Addiction has taken so much from me and gave me nothing in return. I have a daughter who, although I did not give birth to her, is mine never the less. I wish my relationship with her was stronger.


My family is probably more disappointed in me than I think. I’ll do try my very best not to think about the negative, because where I’m headed there is no room for that.

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