This is who I am

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What helps you move forward on difficult days? Share to Show your Support!

I am 20 years old. I can’t believe I made it here. Through everything that has pushed me down, I still stand. The number of times my father knocked me down from the ages of newborn and 6 was uncountable. Little did I know men would hurt me all my life. My uncle beat me. My brothers beat me. I would never be successful because of this.

Read more: Abuse, Anxiety, PTSD, and Depression Survivor

I have issues with having normal relationships with people because I automatically assume people don’t like me and that I’m not a likable person. I can be very hostile sometimes especially when it comes to men. It’s hard for me to have a romantic relationship with someone. In my own head, I am not someone who deserves love. I don’t know how to respond when somebody tells me something nice. There’s always something better I could have done.

Read more: Abuse: The Day the Levy Breaks

All of this prevents me from having close friends. I like being alone most of the time. I get anxious in a crowd of people because I assume right away that they don’t like me. I don’t like going to social events sometimes because of this. I also have issues even when shopping alone, buying food or asking a question at work. This can make me screw up at work which messes with my chance to get promoted in my career, but regardless I still try my best.

What helps you move forward on difficult days? Share to Show your Support!