Have you learned anything new about yourself after you got Diagnosed? What is that? Share to show your Support!
I am 42 years old women who were diagnosed at 15 with manic depression, otherwise known as Bipolar type 1 disorder, personality disorder, PTSD, Schizoaffective disorder and a couple other disorders. I gave up years ago, counting just how many mental disorders I have been diagnosed with. I have been in therapy and hospitals for my mental health since the age of 11, so I have a lot of experience and education on mental illness.
It was just a few years ago that I realized, I have ASD – Asperger syndrome, autism. I have a nephew by marriage who is a teenager now and he has Asperger’s. Well, through the years, I have always felt like I was misdiagnosed with the bipolar and I recognized and related to my nephew who was struggling with Autism. Now, keep in mind Asperger’s is a fully functional type of Autism given the right type of life skills, especially socializing with others. All my life I felt socially retarded. I have never wanted to make eye contact, I don’t have friends and I am just all around odd.
Read more: I was Diagnosed with Lewy Body Dementia
However, about two years ago my nephew was sent to live in a state ran mental hospital until 18 because his behavior had gotten out of control and none of my in-laws knew how to handle him. On the other hand, we developed a special relationship. I just got him and what he was going through, so that is when I started educating myself on ASD, Asperger syndrome, which in my case would have never been rightly diagnosed had I not done the research on Asperger’s for my nephew and our family.
I was born in the 70’s, so autism was rarely diagnosed or recognized in children. As I began my studies on ASD I began to understand myself. I took my self-diagnosis to my therapist a couple of years ago. I did a complete ASD self-evaluation as if I were the therapist and the patient. It came easily to me since mental health has been an issue all my life, but for some reason autism, Asperger’s to be more specific, felt right for my own diagnosis. My bipolar diagnosis never felt right and I couldn’t understand why until I started studying and learning about Asperger’s, while this is a sensory disorder in the brain and it can be managed. It is a functional form of autism. I scored off the chart for having ASD. I was elated.
Read more: I Knew Something was not Right, I just didn’t know the Diagnosis
I kept my therapist informed of what I was doing and why. At first, he was skeptical and didn’t want to really pursue my self-diagnosis, which I can understand. I mean I suffer from mental illness, what could I possibly know about mental illness? Kidding aside, I am happy and satisfied with my somewhat new diagnosis of adult ASD. It feels right. So for those people who are like me and have suffered mental illness and who believe and feel that are misdiagnosed – go with your gut! I live it day in and out so I knew better. Now, I proudly say I am autistic and I feel good about it. It definitely explained my social awkwardness and a number of other things that go hand in hand with my Autism. I am finally gaining some control and understanding of myself. With my therapy and medication for this, along with the proper coping skills given to me, I finally feel normal. On those days when I don’t feel so normal, I do feel good saying it’s due to my Asperger’s, which basically feels normal to me.
