Is it hard for you to let your Guard Down for the ones you care about? Share and Comment to show your Support!
As if love weren’t complicated enough, let’s add psoriasis into the mix and see how this whole relationship stuff works out. It is really easy for people who don’t suffer from psoriasis to give those of us who do all kinds of advice. Everything from home remedies, word of mouth pointers, all the way to how to feel secure in our own skin when it comes to intimacy. Perfect. Kind of like a race car driver giving pointers on childbirth. Just doesn’t help.
Read more: My Psoriasis Makes me Feel like a Circus Freak
Plus the random people we run into out in public with their rude comments, snide looks and whispering. I imagine I’m not the only one who loses it from time to time and says something creative like, “yea don’t get too close, it’s contagious.” Just so they’ll go away.
Well after all the things we go through with people we don’t even know, we are then trying to get into a relationship. It makes a girl/guy just a tad bit insecure as to what will happen if we decide to take a leap of faith and be intimate with someone we care about. First, it’s the awkward dating part where you keep mostly covered up to avoid scaring them off too fast. They you make work up the nerve to just tell them and see what happens. And surprisingly in my experiences, 3/4 times there was never an issue. Well no issues for them, as I always tend to create my own.
So here I am 3 years into a relationship with a great guy. Young, handsome, motivated and we have a little girl. I sometimes find myself thinking, “why does he stick around?” This disease tends to make me a bit crazy sometimes as he wants to love and cuddle me and tell me how beautiful I am. Yet my own insecurities won’t let him be close most times. He’s seen me at my worst. Where I was in so much pain I could barely walk. And he’s seen me at my best when I basically wanted to wear as little as possible because I was enjoying my own body. I know he loves me, that is not an issue. Here’s the problem.
Read more: My Little Humans give me the Strength
We let society beat into our heads that we are less than perfect because we have flare ups, because our blemishes will always be visible even when our skin is clear. They have made us cover up, hide, be ashamed – but why? Why are we ashamed of things out of our control? We didn’t choose this. We didn’t ask to search our entire lives for a cure, or remedy that works even if for just a little while.
My boyfriend knows when I’m having a bad day. He doesn’t mention my psoriasis. He simply says, “I understand babe” and pulls me close. And if someone truly loves you, they do understand. They learn the triggers that not only affect your skin, but you. Even when my hair was falling out he thought I was the most beautiful girl in the world. You don’t have to be afraid to love and be loved in return. There are going to be the few that don’t get it, but the ones who do completely make you forget the ones who don’t. Live, dream and love big, because you are beautiful and the world needs your light.
