Fighting my multiple addictions

Advocating for a better treatment
May 9, 2019
11 years of hell
May 28, 2019

Fighting my multiple addictions

What helps you move forward on difficult days? Show your Support by Commenting!

Hi, my name is Abagail, and I am now 33 years old. I grew up in a family of wonderful parents who love me to death and 5 brothers who love me but don’t know what to think of me and my lifestyle now. They keep trying to get me to change my life with suggestions that I think about, but would rather make bad choices in my life. Thinking they will help me usually turns out terrible because I feel like finding my true love, and Romeo to be would change my life and make me whole, with Jesus being in the center.

Read more: I have an Addiction and I don’t Know How to Fight it

I’m finding out if I don’t fix my addiction that I’m dealing with right now in my life that it’s impossible to figure out where and how to actually try living a normal life without the stress and regret of what I’m doing in my life. Right now, I’m trying to get on a medication to help deal with my severely depressed state of mind. I realize I need to do what is told to me right now because no matter how hard it seems it is to comply with what tasks I need to fulfill, I need just to bite my tongue and do it till I can get the help I need from my doctor’s and psychologist.

I just need to be patient, which is hard to do with everything I have been through in life with all the bad crazy people I have met and been around. People have persuaded me to do and could care less about my feelings in the situation to make them happy. Me not having any self-esteem or really hurt me in my life badly, and I still don’t have much of it.

Read more: How I Overcame 10 Years of Opiate Addiction

My choices right now are still bad, so I know and feel if I put all my heart and trust into Jesus and do what I know is right instead of what I will do just for the moment of fun or satisfaction that I might receive. I refrain from the choices I want to make or do just because I feel like my life is boring or not fun at the time which is every day right now. Being addicted and feeling like I need to be praised for the things I do or getting the feeling I’m loved by anyone I’m talking to or around and realizing that I don’t need the approval of people, but of Jesus.

I need to do what makes me happy, not what makes other people happy. Making any choice in my life right now is hard for me and if I can get any advice from anyone here, especially a doctor or psychiatrist or psychologist would greatly help me right now.

What helps you move forward on difficult days? Show your Support by Commenting!

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1 Comment

  1. Avatar Breanna Archuleta says:

    I just want to say how strong and brave you are for opening up about your addiction!
    I too struggle with addiction to opiates and meth… I’ve actually found sobriety with a sweet blessing from God my son!
    Before I found out not once did I realize how much I didn’t care whay happened in my life or honestly who it affected. Numbing myself was so easy and breaking the rules as did both my mom and dad did. Both parents actively living in their addictions and miserable! For years I was set on Never wanting to live a hard life and have nothing… Well dating a opiate addict before I really understood the concept of his intensity to his addiction, I found myself confused, hurt, tired, always searching for answers, what it really was for me was my curiosity of what it was like not only for him but for both my parents and why did they choose it over me time and time again…
    Some of my mental health issues and physical health issues I had no say in. But still to this day I relapse and I try and give up because I think it’s easier… After I personally lost everything and even now going to be homeless I fight mainly for my son and for myself to be able to raise him the way I never got.

    Stay strong count all of your blessings down to a cup of water! Easier said then done but it’s a life long adventure I rather not say battle… We are just the same as everyone else we just get addictive traits that substances worked their way into.

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