Fighting a Losing Battle Against Yourself


Funny how you feel lonely and so crowded in your own head.
I’m a believer in things I can see, I can touch and I can hear.
Turns out my reality is not the same as another person’s.
This caused me a breakdown.
It literally felt like I didn’t exist nor knew what is real and whatnot.
It is so scary to face the unknown.
The unknown is every human being’s worst fear and here I am trying to recognize it all on my own.
You live in a delusional world that you can explain over and over but it will just not make sense to people you have known for your whole life.
To explain it in the easiest way for people not familiar with this mental illness.
Your mind is the strongest part of your existence and you have no control over it.
Sounds like fighting a losing battle against YOURSELF.
You hear the voices of unfamiliar tones, you have more than imaginary friends and it feels okay because in your world it is normal.
Turns out it is not.
It’s called schizophrenia.
Your loved ones do not hear or see it.

Besides the battle in your head.
Tell people you are diagnosed to try and reach for help and they think you’re a psychopath or a danger to the living.

Look at the bright side though.
YOU are not an alien and you are actually not alone.
Believe it or not, there are so many people going through the same. You will survive if you take this battle on hungry to win it over.
I barely survive, but I don’t stop fighting.
When my world falls apart it begins again the minute I open my eyes in the morning.